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How to break the ice in online dating

By anna on 2 September 2009  |  1 Comment

Approaching a sexy lady is a tricky thing that often leaves guys unsure of what to do. But as nerve-wracking as it in real life, you’ve got time to be cool and calculated when you’re making a move online. Once you’ve been Double-Matched with that special someone on HOT or NOT and it’s time to strike up a conversation, how do you go about it?

The popular opinion of online dating service users dictates that pouring your soul out in five paragraphs as an introductory message is usually met with one overwhelming response – silence. Despite how personal and sincere this message might be, you’re better off saving your life story for later. Use the same logic in meeting matches online that you’d apply to approaching a cutie who catches your eye at the bar – “If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?”

Well, that is if cheesy pick-up lines are your thing (and there’s plenty more where that comes from). But if cheesy pick-up lines have got one thing right it’s that they’re brief – a single line meant to charm your potential catch into striking up an actual conversation.

So, what’s the ideal ice-breaker when you’re messaging someone online for the first time?

• You can’t go wrong with something witty or something that’s sure to get a laugh.
• Ask a relevant question based on your match’s keywords or introduction – you’ve gotta prove that you’re paying attention.
• Write something about yourself that the other person will find intriguing (boys, women can’t resist intrigue).
• Feel free to compliment the other person’s appearance, but don’t be a creep! We hate to break it to you, but telling a girl “you’ve got great boobs” ain’t gonna get you anywhere.
• In fact, don’t mention sex at all.
• Keep it general, so the other person can easily find a related thought or topic to respond with.
• You’re doing this online – so there’s no excuse not to rock your confidence.

If the lady likes cooking, you can write: “I’m no master chef, but I’ve been trying to learn authentic Chinese cuisine. What are some of your favorite recipes? Maybe we can swap. By the way, you have a lovely smile.”

If she’s a sports buff like you, you can write “I’m into hiking, camping, and skiing, but that’s only a portion of what I do in my spare time. Maybe we have more than a love for sports in common…what else are you into?”

If she says she’s an animal lover, you can write: “Do you think you can tame this beast, baby?” …but we wouldn’t expect an answer if we were you.

You get the idea. And even if it wasn’t meant to be, then at least being met with silence on HOT or NOT is nowhere near as harsh as getting rejected to your face, amiright?

What’s the best opening line you’ve ever heard?

1 Comment so far

1. By What Not to Do on a First Date | Official HOT or NOT Blog on 8 September 2009

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